New York Parents Club Founder, Pam Wolf

Greetings New York Parents Club!
 
Several years ago a Wall Street Journal article by Jeffrey Zaslow caught my eye. It began: 
 
“You, You, You — you really are special, you are! You’ve got everything going for you. You’re attractive, witty, brilliant. “Gifted” is the word that comes to mind.” 
 
The article was titled “Most Praised Generation Craves Kudos at the Office,” and went on to explain how over-praising children had led to a generation of self-centered young adults who craved appreciation and constant feedback in the workplace.
 
At the time, Zaslow’s article struck a chord with me, as 95% of my employees at the New York Kids Club happened to be under the age of 30 and fell into this so-called “most-praised generation” category.
 
While I believed I was doing a good job of recognizing the truly exemplary employees, I wondered if the expectations of the team as a whole were being met.
 
So, I appointed a member of the management team to serve as an on-staff “confetti coordinator” to acknowledge jobs well done by dolling out gift cards and congratulatory notes in an effort to keep up employee morale.
 
I launched an annual company achievement awards program and began hosting a quarterly dinner party to celebrate the performance of five employees.
 
To this day, I am constantly seeking new and creative ways to reward deserving employees.
 
Zaslow’s article came to mind again this past week when I found myself pondering the question, “is the cycle of over-praising our youth repeating itself today?”
 
Perhaps.
 
At the New York Kids Club, we recently implemented a rule that parents and caregivers can no longer reward their two-and three-year-old preschool program participants with a lollipop in the lobby after every single day of class attendance.
 
This came after concern was expressed from other parents in the facility that were not applauding and passing out candy and congratulations to their little ones for taking class.
 
The decision did not come without resistance. Feedback included, “What harm is there in a little lollipop?”
 
It’s not the lollipop that concerns me. It’s how the child will feel the day you’re not right there with the treat.
 
I completely support giving praise where praise is due. But I will never be one to dilute the sentiment of truly deserved recognition by passing out obligatory prizes or compliments at every turn. Not with my employees…and not with my children.

Your turn! What do you think?

In your opinion, are we over-praising our children today?

LET IT OUT!

Pam Wolf

New York Kids Club Founder, Pam Wolf

My name is Pam Wolf and I am the mother of four New York City born-and-raised children.  

I am also the founder of a successful New York-based business.  

People often ask me, “How do you do it?”  

“How do you manage?”  

“How do you balance running your own business with the responsibilities of running a household?”  

My question for all of you is, “How do you manage?”  

How does any parent “manage?”  

And why are we focusing on “management” when we should be focusing on celebrating the relationships with our children…and more importantly, living?  

I am guessing parents at any age and stage have some great answers…and great insight into what it takes to raise happy, healthy young children and nurturing meaningful relationships with our adult children. All while maintaining a strong sense of self and, well, our sanity.  

If so, you have come to the right place!  

And if you don’t have any insight your typing fingers are tingling over the keyboard to share…you are still in the right place.  

We learn from one another. We grow as parents, partners and individuals by staying in touch and in tune with the experiences of those around us.  

So, yes, in case you were wondering, that is why I launched the New York Parents Club community: a unique blog-and- forum-combo for parents to connect, share advice and opinions and participate in local events, activities and happenings.  

Each week, I’ll post a new question or topic of interest and relevance to our community.  And, of course, I won’t pass up a chance to offer my own two cents on the subject.  

But, the main goal is to hear from you: the New York parenting community!  

Be sure to join our Facebook page to stay up to date with parent socials and kid-friendly meet-ups. Share what’s on your mind and ask your fellow parents for advice on everything from diapers to local doctors.  

So go ahead: LET IT OUT!  

Pam Wolf